Miscarriage can be a heartbreaking event for both parents. It is also poorly addressed. People around the woman may not be able to understand what she is going through. This is because many people may not be able to relate to what she is going through. This article deals with grief after miscarriage. We understand how to heal emotionally after a miscarriage.
What Happens During a Miscarriage?
Grief After Miscarriage
- The woman can feel confused and panic a lot
- Moreover, she can get angry, frustrated, and irritated.
- There can be loneliness as others may not understand her pain.
- The woman may not be able to concentrate well. Moreover, there can be a lack of motivation.
- She may feel extremely guilty for having caused the event.
- There can be physical symptoms like headaches.
- The woman can feel like a failure.
- Additionally, there can be fear for future pregnancies.
There can be feelings of sorrow whenever the mother opens her medical record such as ultrasound images. When she sees other pregnant women, there can be feelings of jealousy. Other instances such as the baby’s due date or children’s day can bring back memories of the fetus and make her mood miserable.Grief after a miscarriage can come in episodes or come all at once. The mother can feel a void in her life after the loss. Even after the grief has worn off, it may return at some point for some mothers. For instance, when she sees toddlers or infants outside. The intensity of the grief can depend on various factors. When the loss happens at a later stage in the pregnancy, the grief can be more. This is because the mother has spent more time with the fetus and there is more attachment.
How to Heal Emotionally After a Miscarriage
Understand the Grief
It is important to recognize the grief. There can a lot of confusion after the loss of a fetus. You may experience many emotions at a time. It is possible that people around you may share all your emotions or understand none of them. However, it is you who should recognize and validate your emotions. Once you understand that you are going through pain, you can take effective steps toward addressing them. Allow yourself to feel sad. Do not suppress your pain. Take some time off to understand what has happened. You can take some time off from work and allow yourself to recover physically and emotionally from the pain.
Talk It Out!
Find support around you and talk to people. You can talk to your spouse about how you feel. The spouse too may experience grief after miscarriage. They may not be able to express themselves openly. Once you share your pain, they will also be able to open up. It is absolutely normal to grieve for a baby you had not met. You both may have had many dreams for the baby and it is normal to grieve for the loss of those dreams. If talking to your spouse is not an option, talk to your family or friends. Talking helps you to verbalize your pain and emotions. It helps you feel connected with others.
Connecting With Your Baby
If you have been feeling empty and helpless, try to connect with the baby. This can be done in a symbolic way. You can connect with them by writing a letter to them. Many mothers feel that the miscarriage was their fault. Writing a letter can be a cathartic experience for them to pour out their emotions. There are other ways of connecting with the baby such as planting a sapling in their memory or making a donation in their name. These methods can help the mother find some closure.
Eat, Sleep and Rest
Whenever there is grief after a miscarriage, it is difficult to stick to your routine. However, during the miscarriage, the woman becomes very weak. It is important to take good care of the body by eating healthy food. Moreover, the woman also needs to take a good amount of sleep to recover from the physical pain. Take a good amount of rest to feel better physically. Engage in meditation or introspection. Spend time with yourself but don’t be too pushy. Don’t isolate yourself.
Change of Environment
Go for a small vacation or an outing. This will help you find some mental peace. Additionally, when you suffer from a loss, there can be a lot of confusion. Travelling or spending time with nature can help you feel a little better. Moreover, it can offer you time with your partner or yourself to introspect.
Seek Expert’s Help
Grief can be overwhelming. There are many women who suffer from Post-traumatic stress disorder if the grief is not treated. This can lead to many other problems. Therefore if you see that your symptoms persist and are interfering with daily life, see a counselor. Sometimes, it is helpful to talk to an expert who can help you understand your pain and emotions better. Moreover, they can help you learn better ways to heal emotionally after a miscarriage.