Cold Mother Syndrome: Emotionally Unavailable Parents
Written by: Vasundhara Shukla – M. Phil (Psychology)
Last updated date : January 05, 2023
- 1. Signs of Cold Mother Syndrome in Parents
- 1. Signs of Cold Mother Syndrome in Parents
- 2. Social Behavior and Emotionally Unavailable Parents
- 3. The Cold Mother Syndrome and Suppressing Emotions
- 4. Anxiety and Emotionally Unavailable Parents
- 5. Cold Mother Syndrome and Its Effect on Child’s Relationships
- 6. Cold Mother Syndrome and Its Effect on Self-Esteem
- 7. How to Heal from Cold Mother Syndrome?
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A person makes a bond with another person by knowing and responding to their emotional needs. This makes them feel connected and encourages the development of a relationship. This is important to feel warmth and affection from others to go through with life. Emotional availability is important to show that you care for the person. Emotionally unavailability is not being responsive to others’ needs. This is especially necessary for a parent-child relationship. Children see their parents as providers of care and love. ‘Cold mother syndrome’ is related to the mental health issues of the mother because of which she neglects the upbringing of the child. Effects of emotionally unavailable parents can cause difficulty in the child’s ability to form warm and loving relationships.
Chapter 1:
Signs of Cold Mother Syndrome in Parents
- Parents think about themselves first rather than the well-being of the child
- They fulfill general needs but not emotional needs
- Children are not permited to show negative feelings
- Do not praise the child
- Expects the child to fulfill the need for warmth and love by himself or herself
Chapter 2:
Social Behavior and Emotionally Unavailable Parents
Chapter 3:
The Cold Mother Syndrome and Suppressing Emotions
Chapter 4:
Anxiety and Emotionally Unavailable Parents
Chapter 5:
Cold Mother Syndrome and Its Effect on Child’s Relationships
Chapter 6:
Cold Mother Syndrome and Its Effect on Self-Esteem
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Chapter 7:
How to Heal from Cold Mother Syndrome?
Knowing how did your parents cause such problems can stop you from behaving this way in your relationships. There are some ways you can heal yourself in such situations-
Show Your Feelings
It will be difficult to understand and acknowledge what happened in childhood because you might feel ashamed of it. And might take time to admit it yourself before telling this to others. But acknowledgment is the first step to healing. By telling someone trustworthy about your problems you can take their help to heal. You could also take help from a mental health professional to gain an even deeper understanding of the effects of neglect.Practice Self-Love
Cold mother syndrome is when your parents are critical of everything you do. This can lead to self-doubts and can make you dislike yourself. By understanding that you are a person worthy of love, care, and praise, you can undo the damage caused by your upbringing. Just because your parents did not praise you, doesn’t mean that you don’t deserve a pat on the back.Create and Expand Your Self-Awareness
This is created by turning inwards and understanding who you are, aside from what your parents told you. Your feelings and what you want to do in life. Take the opportunity to analyze how you are feeling. You need to develop the ability to identify the feelings you are experiencing as well as gain control over them.Be Your Parent
Just because your parents could not fulfill your needs for closeness does not mean that you will never be able to fulfill them. As we grow up, we create more and more space for meeting like-minded people. You will get to meet people who will be happy to bond with you and help you heal from the past.Teach Yourself to Forgive
This is difficult to do when you suffered because of a dismissive parent. You can try to rebuild a relationship with your mother. Now she would not have the power to control you as she did as a child. You can give feedback on her treatment of you as a child. A conversation helps the parent know what hurt you and find new grounds to build the relationship again.One of the effects of such parenting is low self-esteem in children. Enroll in our course on the same to know how to overcome it.
"Structured and engaging course" Joan
69 sections
6-Weeks Self-Paced
- Educational Content
- Quizzes
- Self-reflection material
- Suggestions & feedback
- Worksheet, tips & tools to use
$9.00
$12.00
25% discount