Feeling Lonely After a Breakup - How to Deal With It!

Written by: Tanvi Vinay Gangavali – MA (Psychology)

Last updated date: January 10, 2023

A breakup can be tough. It’s OK to feel sad or angry. Feeling lonely after a breakup is harder than the breakup itself. Loneliness after a break-up is common. It is also expected. Break-ups stir up strong emotions. Many of the emotions lead to feelings of loneliness. It’s OK to take time to get over the loss of a relationship. After a breakup, everyone thinks about how to deal with loneliness after a breakup.

Some people feel as though their world has turned upside down. They also feel that things will never be good again. You might be want to get over a breakup quickly. But, it takes time, work and support. This article helps to know how you feel after a breakup. Also, how to deal with loneliness after a breakup.

“Practical and insightful” David

70 sections

6-Weeks Self-Paced

  • Educational Content
  • Quizzes
  • Self-reflection material
  • Suggestions & feedback
  • Worksheet, tips & tools to use
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Chapter 1:

Feelings After a Breakup

After a breakup, there are many emotions that you feel. These emotions can disturb you. It can also make you feel stressed.
  1. Sadness
  2. Anger
  3. Guilt
  4. Lonely
  5. Frustrated
  6. Rejected
  7. Confused
  8. Stressed
  9. Fearful
  10. Restless
  11. Loss of appetite
  12. Lack of sleep
  13. Low interest
  14. Low energy.

Chapter 2:

The Emotional Stages Most People Go Through After a Breakup

Feeling lonely after a breakup? Feeling confused about what to do next? Everyone will go through different stages at different times. Listed below are stages and the most relatable statement which helps to know the stage a little more-
  • Shock and denial. (“ This cannot happen to me.”)
  • Desperate need for answers (“Why did this happen to me?”)
  • Fear, loneliness, and sadness (“I feel sad and feel like crying.”)
  • Bargaining (the “crazy” stage) (” I will get my ex back to me at any cost”)
  • Anger ( “I don’t understand why they left me.”)
  • Peace and acceptance (” I am capable of being loved and it is okay.”)
  • Forgiveness (“I will move on.”)

Chapter 3:

What Makes You Feel Lonely After a Breakup?

When a relationship ends, it is natural to feel lonely after a breakup. Many factors lead to post-breakup loneliness:
  • Emotions: Break-ups put you on an emotional ride. Sadness is common. There are also feelings of grief. You also feel angry towards your partner. So, these emotions disturb you. Also, you isolate yourself, which lead to feeling lonely after a breakup.
  • Distancing: After a break-up, you separate from friends and family. Also, you stay away from people closest to your ex. These people were an important part of your life and now are no longer in your new life. Hence, this makes you feel lonely after a breakup.
  • Holiday blues: Break-ups change the way you holiday. When it is holiday time, all those memories come back. This can make you feel lonely.
  • Memories-You: avoid going to places or doing things that you did with your partner. Also, you prefer to stay alone and away. This also causes loneliness.

Chapter 4:

How Long Does Feeling Lonely after a Breakup Last?

How long you feel lonely depends on the factors you are dealing with. Feelings of social isolation are present—it may be because of a particular situation or may come and go. For example, a holiday brings back memories of loneliness and reduces after the holiday.

For many, loneliness in a break-up is temporary. Moreover, it is part of the grieving. Also, it is a healing process. If loneliness goes on and on and seems never-ending, then you need help. Hence, you can seek help from your doctor or a therapist. They can help.

Chapter 5:

How to Deal With Feeling Lonely After a Breakup: Do Not Do This!

  • When your heart is broken, it is easy to go into your shell. A little bit of wallowing is natural. But, it is in your hands if you want to be in that state for long or effort to get out of it.
  • Avoid locking yourself in the room.
  • Do not isolate yourself.
  • Do not binge-eat or sleep too much. Stay Active.
  • Do not blame yourself for the breakup.

Chapter 6:

How to Deal With Loneliness After a Breakup: Do This!

  • Give yourself some space.
  • Let yourself cry.
  • Accept how you feel.
  • Try to block the person for a while after the break-up – even online.
  • Keep yourself busy.
  • Find a new hobby.
  • After a breakup, you will have a lot of free time. So, you can plan your day. Also, do things that you enjoy.
  • Take time out for yourself every day.
  • Focus on doing things that you enjoy. For example-watching a movie or listening to music. Also, meditating and reading can be helpful.
  • Talk to friends and family and others who can help you.
  • Do not use alcohol and other drugs to deal with the pain.
  • Time heals things. Give yourself time to cope with the change after a break-up.
  • Make an effort to stay healthy during this healing process.
  • Try to get regular sleep & and exercise.

Chapter 7:

Feeling Lonely After A Breakup? – This Piece of Advice Is for You!

  • This phase won’t last long.
  • It may take some time to get over.
  • Breakup doesn’t mean that there’s anything wrong with you.
  • It’s better not to be in a relationship than to be in a bad one.
  • It is okay to feel upset and angry.
  • Do not worry about how the situation will look to others.
  • Try to see the positives in a breakup.
  • Also, with time and support you can come out stronger of a breakup.
  • You deserve to be happy.

Chapter 8:

An Exercise to Try While Dealing With Loneliness After a Breakup

Once the shock of the breakup settles down, you can sit down and write answers to the questions. This will help you reflect. Also, make you feel better-
  1. Write the exact cause of the breakup.
  2. Can you think of ideas of how you could have done certain things in your relationship differently?
  3. Think of long-term solutions for your future.
  4. How can you ensure that these are long-term solutions?
  5. What things of your personal life (people, hobbies) did you miss while you were in this relationship?
  6. Is there something that you can do to restart them?
  7. Are there any new activities that you want to start?

Chapter 9:

When to Get Some Help

Break-ups can feel like the end of the world. However, most people deal with it. If you feel you are not feeling better even after many months or longer than two weeks then you need to seek help. Sometimes a break-up can lead to depression. Also, some people can also face anxiety issues.

If you find it difficult to move on or do not know how to deal with loneliness after a breakup, it’s important to seek help. You can talk to your friend or family member. However, if you want to talk to someone outside your family and friends, a counsellor may be helpful.

If you feel you need more help then you can register yourself for an online course on our website.

"Practical and insightful" David

70 sections

6-Weeks Self-Paced

  • Educational Content
  • Quizzes
  • Self-reflection material
  • Suggestions & feedback
  • Worksheet, tips & tools to use

$9.00 $12.00

25% discount