Feeling Sad about Missing Someone? How Do You Stop It?​

Written by: Ankita Kathad – MA (Clinical Psychology)

Last updated date : January 17, 2023

We often feel sad when people go away from our lives. For example, when our parents move away from us, we miss them a lot. When our best friend goes to live in another town, we miss them. Breaking up with a romantic partner makes us very sad and we miss them so much. We often feel guilty about spending hours together on missing them. This guilt can make us sad. Sometimes the person who has gone away returns. Whereas sometimes they don’t. When we lose someone to death, we can never have them back.

This is a terrible feeling. How do we stop this sadness? This article aims to understand how we can stop feeling sad about missing someone and how we do we stop missing someone.

“Practical and insightful” David

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Chapter 1:

Why Are You Feeling Sad About Missing Someone?

When we miss someone, we just can’t get that feeling out of our heads. The feeling stays with us for a very long time. It is very normal to miss someone. However, the emotions that come along with missing someone varies. You can feel hopeful, happy or even excited. However, it is very disturbing when you feel sad about missing someone. Why do we feel sad about missing someone? Here are some reasons.

  • As humans we all bond with other people. Missing someone is usually in response to the person being absent in the moment. Failure to catch up, meet or be present makes us miss that person. When we are unable to meet the person we miss, which is why we may be feeling sad about missing them.
  • When there are some negative memories associated with the person, we feel sad about missing them. So to say that when someone has hurt us or caused us pain, their memory makes us sad.
  • We can feel sad about missing someone when we know that they don’t miss us back.
  • When there is some unfinished business with the person who is gone, we can feel sad. For instance, if a person has left an important commitment halfway, we can feel sad. If they had made any promises and left without keeping those promises, we can feel sad.
  • If we have hurt someone and if they have left because of it then we can feel sad. We can feel guilty that we hurt them. Any memory of the person can reopen fresh wounds.

Chapter 2:

What Happens When We Feel Sad About Missing Someone?

When we feel sad about missing someone, we keep thinking about the person or the event that we miss. We can get preoccupied with their thoughts. If there was a negative event that makes us sad, we may keep replaying that scene. We keep thinking of ways the event could have been different.

Even the scents similar to the person can cause a wave of memories to rush in and make us sad. We can become upset at the sight of a person’s favorite food. Our entire day can get ruined by a small memory of the person.

When we realize that the person doesn’t miss us back, we can get even more upset. We can feel like crying and shouting. Moreover, we can feel depressed. All of this is normal. They are all result of the fact that we valued the person.

When we feel sad about missing someone, we feel desperate to call them. Tell them what we feel like. We don’t feel like talking to anyone else.

Chapter 3:

How to Stop Missing Someone?

“Move on!” is the most likely answer you will get when you tell people that you miss someone. However, we’ll know how hard it is. If it was that easy, we wouldn’t be feeling so sad right? It’s a long process to stop missing someone. The best option is to look forward of course. Understand that you are worthy enough to be loved by someone else. Try to be hopeful and look for brighter things, that the future has to offer. Moreover, the following steps can help you to stop missing someone.


When you are feeling sad about missing someone, the first thing to do is accept it. Understand what you are currently feeling. Understand the intensity of your sadness. If you are feeling very sad, talk to someone about it.

Engage in events where you can meet new people and establish a connection with them. When you are feeling sad about missing someone, it is more likely that the person has left a vacuum in your life. This emptiness makes you sad. Try talking to different people. This can help you fill the vacuum.


If you are feeling very sad about missing someone, you can communicate it to them. If possible talk to them on call. Try writing a letter. If communication is not possible fr some reason, then try writing a letter without an address. Pour out your feelings in the letter and let the person know how much you miss them.

Often, when there is unfinished business or abrupt endings, we feel sad after the person leaves. This gives us discomfort as we cannot find closure.

Communication is the best way to find closure.


Another way of finding closure is to introspect. We can turn inward when we are feeling sad about missing someone. Facing your deepest feelings can be scary but it can provide a lot of insights. We can understand the situation better. Introspection helps us bring clarity to deep issues such as missing someone.

When we miss someone, we can ruminate over those thoughts the entire day. It can affect our lives, our moods and our relationships. We can introspect and ask ourselves how deeply are we affected by the other person’s absence. We can practice reflection and prepare ourselves to move on in life.

Exercise and Meditate
Exercise is a simple and effective way to clear cloudy thoughts. When you feel sad about missing someone, your judgement is clouded. Your mood is confused. When you exercise or meditate, you pave way for happy hormones. These hormones let you concentrate better on the next task

Exercising is also a great way to introspect. It helps you face your innermost feelings. When you exercise you also focus on improving yourself which helps you move on.

Channel You Energies
If you are feeling sad about missing someone dead, you can channel those energies into something good. The best way you can preserve the memory of the person who is gone is by internalizing their good qualities. You can also honor their memory by doing simple things like naming a corner of the house after the person, planting a tree after the person or donating in the name of the person.

Other ways to channel your energies include writing a song or a poem. You can write a blog or a small article to honor the person. If you feel that a person is gone from your life due to a mistake of yours then you can try working on improving yourself.

When we feel sad about missing a person, the best way to stop missing them is to cherish their memories. When our loved ones die, we are often sad because we feel that sooner or later their parts of existence will fade. We can therefore preserve their existence in the form of good memories and thoughts.

Give Yourself Some Time

The best way to stop missing someone is to stop trying so hard. When we desperately make attempts to forget the person, we end up missing them more. Time has its ingredients and methods to heal wounds. It is best to surrender to time, while we do our best to make ourselves feel better.

Acceptance comes with time. When we want to stop missing someone, we can begin by reducing the amount of time we think of them. Initially, we can spend some hours of the day in recollection of thoughts of the person. However later on, as time passes we need to limit that time. We need to train our minds to focus on other aspects of life.

A practical way of doing this is by maintaining a diary and allowing a ‘memory time’ in the day. We can write about our thoughts and feelings in the diary. We can tell ourselves when we feel sad about missing someone, “I know I miss the person but right now I will focus on the task at hand and write about my feelings in the diary later”.

Moving On
In conclusion, feeling sad about missing someone is a perfectly normal emotional response of humans. It is only problematic when it affects our daily lives. At Epsychonline, there are self-help courses that help you deal with feelings of grief and overcome sadness. These courses are curated by experts that help you when you want to stop missing someone. Do check them out.

"Practical and insightful" David

70 sections

6-Weeks Self-Paced

  • Educational Content
  • Quizzes
  • Self-reflection material
  • Suggestions & feedback
  • Worksheet, tips & tools to use

$9.00 $12.00

25% discount