How to Make Your Parents Understand How You Feel?

Written by: Harmandeep Kaur Grewal – MA (Psychology)

Last updated date : October 31, 2022

You may know the experience when you are telling your parents about something but they do not get you. And, you feel a lot of frustration. Then people ask, how to make your parents understand how you feel? And some say that my parents don’t understand me. You should be very patient if your parent is strict or rigid. But never get angry or hostile with your mother or father. Because it will increase the distance between you and him/her. Therefore, learn to directly or directly talk to your rigid parent and then find a solution to further your issue without getting overwhelmed.

Additionally, you are a mature person. And to some extent your parents also understand you. But they may have their beliefs and value systems that you could not change. On the whole, as an adult, you must make your parent understand your situation. In addition, you should accept whatever their decision is and not start to fight with them because they do not agree with you. Because they have learned things from their experience while you have your understanding. Nevertheless, the generation gap will always be present but be open-minded on your side. You are bound to have an opinion but you cannot force it upon anyone else. As a child under 18 or 16, you are following the rules made at home. But you can keep your suggestions and questions to your father or mother.


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Chapter 1:

How to Make Your Parents Understand?

How to make your parents understand how you feel? And some say that my parents don’t understand me.

  • First of all, listen to them. Your mother or father has more experience than you have so hear them out. Later when you feel that you want something else than what your parents are suggesting then you can talk to them. But do not go bonkers. You should stay calm if you want the thing. DO not forget your parent have the power to disagree with you and you may not be able to do anything. But only state your opinion and not force it. For instance, your parent wants you to attend summer school for learning new skills. But you want to learn dance. Thus you tell your parent or make them believe in you. You should show dedication to your art for them to understand you. Presuming that they understand you then you should make them proud and not regret their decision.
  • Secondly, if you have a difficult mother or father, who hardly hears you then you should find a way to solve your problem. For example, your father is a strict person. You want to enroll in a music academy and he does not want to hear about music. But you cannot confront him because he will say no to you. You should then think about what you will do. You can earn success in music performance for him to notice. Otherwise, you can check out scholarship programs that can help you with the fees.
  • Thirdly, most parents eventually get what their children want from them. But it is just a matter of time so be patient and learn to accept your parent’s decisions.

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Chapter 2:

Why Do Parents Disagree?

How to make your parents understand how you feel? Furthermore, my parents don’t understand me. So look for ways to make your parents understand your feelings.

Firstly, your parents do not trust you as much as they should so they disagree with you all the time. For instance, in past, your parents believed in you and you were unsuccessful in meeting their expectations so they now doubt you every time you say you want something different. Therefore, you need to increase your mother or father’s faith in you. And this can be done by meeting their expectations and showing your dedication and sincerity to a task. For instance, you want to be a writer. Then you should be able to write something before asking your parents for permission to study in the field. Furthermore, get good results at school so that your teacher can take your side and help you in your goal.

Secondly, you and your parents have a huge generation gap. When your parents were young they did not see things. Therefore, show patience with your parent’s decisions. And do not overreact if they say something which you do not like. For instance, they disagree with you on your choice of career. And, you in anger smashed the glass window of your bedroom. Therefore, avoid any nuisance which can come around and haunt you. As your parents will know about it and they will reprimand you further. And this never-ending cycle of hostility will go on in your life. Consequently, show you care about your father’s decision. And later find a solution to your question.

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Chapter 3:

Ways to Deal With the Generation Gap Between You and Your Parents

How to make your parents understand how you feel? Moreover, people say that my parents don’t understand me.

First of all, you like to listen to loud music while your father enjoys calm and soothing music. So there are arguments in your house about the noise and what to play with at home. Moreover, there could be disagreements over the kind of program which you want to see and what your parents want to watch. For instance, you want to listen to MTV while your mother wants to watch a soap opera. And you both fight over it. Therefore you need to find a solution to your issues.

You can keep an open mind to your paren as you know that they have different tastes compared to you. Therefore, they will like something else compared to you. So disagreement is possible and you should not continue your fight over minute reasons. Moreover, know that your parents want no harm. It’s just that they have different viewpoints and they think differently.

Secondly, you should tell clearly to your mother what you want. For instance, your mom is looking for a boy for you to marry. But you have a boyfriend. And you are scared to tell her about him. Therefore you agree with her about her choices of boys for you. In contrast, you should state or express your feelings clearly.

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Chapter 4:

Be Patient and Tolerant

How to make your parents understand how you feel? So you say that my parents don’t understand me.

Listen to your parents and then say something. You need to be patient when dealing with elders as they have their experience of life. And in your impulsive act, you may hurt their feelings. Accordingly, be patient and calm. But if you have different plans for yourself then you need to prove yourself to your mother or father.

For more information, please click “Courses” on the navigation bar and check out the many self-paced online courses available on different topics related to mental health and wellbeing. The course titled “Low self-esteem” provides more information on the current topic.


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  • Educational Content
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  • Self-reflection material
  • Suggestions & feedback
  • Worksheet, tips & tools to use

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25% discount