Jealousy Doesn’t Have to Ruin a Friendship

Written by: Harmandeep Kaur Grewal – MA

Last updated date : January 20, 2023

In friendship, people may have good relationships, but there can be a low period too. When you feel detached from your friends, you do not understand yourself. And despite their presence, you are alone. But most of the time, people need to choose friends. Also, you can make friends through school and college. And all relations may not be selfish. But having a selfless one is rare where there are no negative emotions. We are human beings filled with desires and can feel envy of close ones too. We are not perfect and should not try to be. As such, jealousy doesn’t have to ruin a friendship. When do you ask “why am I jealous of my friend?”

There could be several reasons for this. You feel left out by the person whom you had trusted,and feel that he or she has gone ahead of you while you are still away or lacking so much. It could happen when there is a lack of understanding between friends. If two people understand one another, then they would not feel left out. Sometimes, several things are happening which make us move away from our friends. It can cause a rift in good relations. You visit a friend who has built a home, but you live on rent. You will feel about your situation. It can cause jealousy. But it does not mean you will not talk to your friend just because he or she is more successful than you.

In this article, we will discuss how jealousy need not ruin a friendship and what can be the various stages of a friendship. Also,why rift happens between close friends and how to mend differences.






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Chapter 1:

Jealousy Doesn’t Have to Ruin a Friendship

You can define a person’s relationship simply. There are complications. You may be close to a person for ten years. But when you change the city then you forget about one another in a year. It can happen as your priorities change. And other people may take your place and you feel left out. Your circumstances may not be the same as your friend’s. For instance, your close friend was born with a silver spoon. While your parents were working class. And you need to struggle for everything. Your friend got a house from his parents. Therefore, you are bound to feel envy. Moreover, if you could not be successful in life then jealousy will develop. Jealousy doesn’t have to ruin a friendship

Furthermore, you can define your connection. You need to be mindful of yourself. Do not let others put things in your ears. When friends hear things about themselves from others then they should trust their friends because loyalty is essential. But we are not perfect and may not react properly. We can strive to be nice as much as possible. Why am I jealous of my friend? This is a question in the minds of a lot of people.

Similarly, when you have negative emotions, then you may stay alert and not blindly trust anyone. But do not go too high on emotions and never vent your anger on other people. You are responsible for your acts. So, stop blaming others for bad things in your life and take some responsibility.

First of all, your friend makes a face when she or he sees you. And you are taken aback by his behavior. Also, you could not understand why he was behaving this way. He does not greet you properly. And may pass certain negative comments. Moreover, there is a chance he may taunt you for your success. But you should not feel bad about yourself on the basis of the others treatment. Jealousy doesn’t have to ruin a friendship

Secondly, they do not let you say anything. And all talk and actions are about him. You feel left out and suffocated. Your friend may be doing this intentionally to hurt you. So, you should be self-aware of the situation.

Next, you have supported your friend in the past. And when you need him, he is nowhere. Also, you feel betrayed as you get no help from him because he feels that you do not deserve or want his help. Usually, you may ask “why am I jealous of my friend?”.

Fourthly, they would manipulate you and make you feel bad about yourself. You should not get into his tricks. Never feel ashamed or embarrassed because of him.

Chapter 2:

Stages in Friendships

First of all, when you start to know a person then you know little. For instance, you have seen a classmate several times. But you do not know much about one another. So, you do not think much. But as your relationship grows, you get to know each other. Jealousy doesn’t have to ruin a friendship.

Next of all, you become close and share your things. And here you understand each other. Then as your life changes, so do your friends. Therefore, you keep learning new things about one another. You can ask “why am I jealous of my friend?”.

Then your relationship may grow into an intimate one. Here you tell each other things which no one else knows about you. For instance, you share things about your romance, family, etc. Her trust and faith are very important.

Chapter 3:

Dealing With Negative Emotions

First of all, practice mindfulness. You need to understand why you feel this way. For instance, you feel that your friend has achieved so much while you could not do anything for yourself. So, you are jealous and angry. But how is that your friend’s fault? You can always stay in reality and keep asking yourself useful questions. But never let high emotions get the best of you. You need to control your mind. When you are self-aware of the situation, then you will not do anything stupid. Jealousy doesn’t have to ruin the friendship. And people ask why am I jealous of my friend.

Secondly, you need to fill your mind with positive emotions. Why would you only focus on anger and envy? When you know there are good moments, you need to cherish them. Moreover, you should tell yourself that it is a phase you are in, and it will eventually pass. Also, give yourself time. If you feel anger at a person you know for too long, then avoid talking to him. You can in the time being, reduce the high emotions.

Thirdly, increase empathy. You can understand your friend better. As you know many things in his life. Moreover, if you will judge him, then who will get him? You see, material things or fake smiles may not show happiness. As a friend, you need to look deeper. Then you will understand the scenario.

Next, jealousy could be a phase in your friendship and you need to pass this phase without causing any damage.

Chapter 4:

Final Thought

For more information, you can click “Courses” on the navigation bar as there are several online courses that can help in many areas, please check them out. Moreover, the Low Self-Esteem course will help you deal with your issues.


"Structured and engaging course" Joan

69 sections

6-Weeks Self-Paced

  • Educational Content
  • Quizzes
  • Self-reflection material
  • Suggestions & feedback
  • Worksheet, tips & tools to use

$9.00 $12.00

25% discount