Men with Low Self-Esteem

Written by: Dr Joseph Kekulawala (Psychiatrist)

Last updated date : March 29, 2022

Self-esteem can be described as how we see ourselves or our opinion of ourselves. Our self-esteem changes, and we know this from our experiences. It depends on whats going on in our lives, our temperament and past experiences. How we view ourselves is important because it affects our choices and our motivation. This article is for men with low self-esteem. We cover 9 signs of low self-esteem in a man before discussing where to get help. 

Chapter 1:

Men with Low Self-Esteem Fear Criticism

When someone gives us negative feedback, or we get a poor grade or report at work, it is normal to feel sad. If that feeling lingers for a long time, it could be a sign low self-esteem. If your self-esteem is healthy, you will be able to life yourself back up soon after.

Someone with low self-esteem fears getting feedback. They worry that it might confirm their fears about themselves. If a man has a healthy self-esteem and a positive mindset, he will take that criticism and make something positive from it.

Men with low self-esteem, eyes downcast, standing in a corner at a busy gym

Chapter 2:

Not Taking Compliments

Men with low self-regard think they are not worthy, it doesn’t feel right to them. They struggle to hear anything positive about them. Their views of themselves are harsher than those of others.

They struggle to take a complement for a “job well done”, it doesn’t ring true to them. Why? Because the compliment clashes with their view of themselves.


Chapter 3:

Avoiding Anything New

One of the other classic signs of low self-esteem in a man is avoidance. Men with low self-esteem just don’t back themselves. They lack the self-confidence to take a chance. If their boss gives them a challenge, something new to try, they prefer to turn it down. 


Chapter 4:


Men with low self-esteem blame themselves when things go wrong. Usually, this self-blame is extreme and unfair. For instance, when the team they are in doesn’t meet perform, one of the signs of low self-esteem in a man is thinking it was entirely his fauly. 


Chapter 5:

Negative Self Talk

Our minds create thousands of thoughts and ideas each day. Men with low self-esteem have more negative thoughts. They are focused on their flaws, negative memories or hurtful things people have said. Examples of negative self-talk are “I suck at this..I don’t deserve this..I’ll never get it right”.


Chapter 6:

Negative Outlook

Another one of the classic signs of low self-esteem in a man is having a negative outlook. Someone with low self-esteem may be hopeless. Why? It’s because they don’t back themselves or believe in themselves. Their outlook is negative or cloudy. 


Chapter 7:

Men with Low Self-Esteem Worry

Worry or fear is related to the notion that men with low self-esteem have negative critical thoughts. Since they have negative thoughts, they are more likely to perseverate or obsess over perceived faults. 


Chapter 8:

Not Standing up for Yourself

Men with low self-esteem may quickly back down during our discussion. Why? To avoid conflict, they don’t express their views and wishes. Often they think others’ views and wishes are more important. As you can understand, this leaves them vulnerable to abuse. 


Chapter 9:

Body Language

Generally, we don’t consider body language as a sign of low self-regard. However, there is increasing research done linking body language to self-esteem. Men with low self-esteem are more likely to have a hunched or closed-off posture. The body and mind are closely connected. When someone feels unworthy, shame or uncertain of themselves, they are more likely to adopt a hunched or submissive posture. These are 9 possible signs of low self-esteem in a man. If you recognise any of them, it may be worth looking into. Low self-esteem can raise the risk of mental illness. We have a series of articles here at Epsychonline, along with a course on low self-esteem. We hope you have found this article helpful. Please send us any feedback or suggestions that you have.